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Friday, October 14, 2011

Catechism

This is wrong.

Be more specific.

It is wrong in a way that can be divided into tiers.

How numerous are these tiers?

It is wrong on many levels.

Provide a helpful comparison.

It is wrong on more levels than a Chinese pagoda with duelling Bavarian Oom-pa-pa bands on every floor.

There is no possible justification for selling a gut-lubricating Kiwifruit concentrate and calling it "Phloe". Bad limericks about your friend Chloe do not count.

"Tell us your story and win!" the manufacturers rather rashly suggest.
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14 comments:

  1. Substance McGravitasOctober 14, 2011 at 10:22 PM

    Holy crap!

    ReplyDelete
  2. M. BouffantOctober 14, 2011 at 11:43 PM

    Regularity is the least of my problems, indeed, I'm hoping SMcG will spare me some of his codeine-laced Tylenol to tighten me up.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Smut ClydeOctober 15, 2011 at 4:13 AM

    Let's see. Take expensive bowel-irritating kiwifruit-extract tablets, or live on a diet of coffee and wheat beer and black-pudding-&-chilli pizza? Decisions, decisions.

    ReplyDelete
  4. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®©October 15, 2011 at 5:17 AM

    POOP!
    ~

    ReplyDelete
  5. fishOctober 15, 2011 at 6:17 AM

    It causes rashes too?!?!

    ReplyDelete
  6. J—October 15, 2011 at 8:15 AM

    Bad limericks about your friend Chloe do not count.

    Now here's a little story about Zoë and Joey
    Went to the store and bought a little Phloe
    Took it back home and poured it in a bowly
    Now they don't need to buy more colon blowy

    ReplyDelete
  7. tigrisOctober 15, 2011 at 8:46 AM

    Kiwis are birds, men and fruit
    but only one opens the chute
    it will open the phloe
    of those in the know
    though which and how much to dilute?

    ReplyDelete
  8. UnknownOctober 15, 2011 at 9:29 AM

    LOL...you so crack me up Clyde. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  9. mikeyOctober 15, 2011 at 9:53 AM

    At my age I won't renounce it
    But as long as they've come to announce it
    It's true those in my group
    Can need help with our poop
    I'd get Phloe if I could only pronounce it

    ReplyDelete
  10. JenniferOctober 15, 2011 at 10:38 AM

    Sounds more like a menstrual aid...

    ReplyDelete
  11. Big Bad Bald BastardOctober 15, 2011 at 12:01 PM

    It is wrong on more levels than a Chinese pagoda with duelling Bavarian Oom-pa-pa bands on every floor

    Smut is banned!

    tigris, on the other hand, wins teh t00bz.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Smut ClydeOctober 15, 2011 at 1:04 PM

    Related.

    Smut is banned!
    TO be fair to the Bavarians, that pagoda normally contains only one Oom-pa-pa banned at a time.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Dr.KennethNoisewaterOctober 15, 2011 at 3:59 PM

    I would be really--erm--relieved if these colon-obsessed people would just come right and say what their products do.

    Consider these awesome catchphrases:

    Phloe: It Makes You Poo
    Phloe: Poop Happens

    These ads write themselves...iffin' you're willing to be honest.

    ReplyDelete
  14. ckc (not kc)October 17, 2011 at 8:51 PM

    Phloe: Are you so bunged up your back teeth are brown?

    ReplyDelete