Sunday, April 25, 2010

Who is Anti-Hitler???

When we last visited Nile Gardiner he had recovered from the devastating effects of viewing "Avatar" and had moved onto being energised Bunny at CPAC. Now though he has a bigger fish to fry and it is the ancient evil that can strike anywhere, anytime, er Nick Clegg.
That's right the biggest threat to Liberty, Democracy and a chicken based health service, Nick Clegg.
 It's sort of like being scared of balloons but with less reasoning.
Possibly after inhaling helium, Niles assures us, Clegg is the ANTI-CHURCHILL!!11~
I know I had to change my underwear twice after reading that. Nile points out that once Clegg wrote a newspaper column where he revealed that as a teenager he had felt sorry for some German students who being harassed by Clegg's English classmates, about  the war, probably 40 years after that war finished.
I wonder if the Anti-Churchill wouldn't send people to the Dardanelles and have it turn into the biggest fuck-up since the time before? This would be a terrible thing since ANZAC day would not exist and we in the antipodeans would be at a loss on April 25 and 26.
Also would the anti-Chruchill not do the zingo one liners and not build brick walls. It is a minefield of things that the anti-churchill would not be able to do.
But the majorly interesting thing is: WTF threat is Clegg to the alternate universe Niles lives in? He's written column after column about how truly awful and scary Clegg is, backed up by such searing revelations as "I felt sorry for the German kids". It's a mystery to me why the epitome of English inoffensiveness would... ah, Clegg is not weird enough thus must be a lefty and thus want to put people in death camps. Also he might enable Gordon Brown to stay in power. Note: it is not the vile Tories who are the problem it is the evil Lib/Dems with their studied inoffensiveness and "More tea Vicar?" manners who are taking England off to the Gulags.
One has commented before about the embalmed look of Nile's byline photo. I wonder if the Botox needle went in a bit far, there.

14 comments:

Smut Clyde said...

Ask your doctor if trans-orbital Botox is right for you!

Smut Clyde said...

Also, if Americans like Gardiner do not like the results of the UK election and set about funding a colour-coded People-Power revolution to overthrow the resulting government, have they thought about what they are going to call it? Somehow "The Dingy Grey Revolution" does not strike me as destined to capture sympathetic headlines.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

...f Americans like Gardiner do not like the results of the UK election and set about funding a colour-coded People-Power revolution to overthrow the resulting government, have they thought about what they are going to call it?

They'd get Luntz right on it.
~

mikey said...

It has been my understanding that the revolution color-codes actually must, in order to be valid, reflect some real life item, preferably a flower, bush or shrub that in some way embodies said color. As in your basic oranges, roses and tulips. [Hey! Know what's better than roses on a piano? Tulips on an organ. HAH!] Given this valuable information on the unwritten rules of revolution coloring, let's see if we can come up with a name for your prospective English People Power uprising. As dingy grey has been suggested and rejected, I can think of no better revolutionary sobriquet than "Dutch Elm"....

Smut Clyde said...

If the idea is to choose an iconic English flower-name for the Glorious Uprising then it would have to be the Cowslip Revolution, but the Sun readers are not noted for their literacy, so there is the danger that they would misread the instructions and turn up for the protest with parsnips pinned to their lapels.

Another Kiwi said...

Given that Nile's readership is into the olde fashioned stuff, no better candidate than the Nosegay revolution presents itself.
Leading to such delicious conversations as "Pssst are you in the nosegays?"

J— said...

I'd be very wary of this Gardiner guy. He studied anthropology and archaeology and married a Spaniard. That's not how Churchill played cricket!

J— said...

Scratch that. Trust Gardiner, don't trust Nick "Are you sure your real name isn't Johnny" Clegg.

mikey said...

Upon reflection, shouldn't the title be "Why is Anti-Hitler"?

Or is that a question that can only be addressed by the Anti-Heller?

Smut Clyde said...

Nick "Are you sure your real name isn't Johnny" Clegg

Does he have a wooden leg? Did he win it in the war (in 1944)? Inquiring minds are inquiring.

Another Kiwi said...

It is a concern if people from the Anti-Universe are going to start showing up in this universe and causing trouble. Look out for a "Let Go 11" from the Anti-Heller any day.
This Johnny Clegg is the "Scatterlings of Africa" guy, isn't he? I wonder if he could be the Anti-Nick Glegg??
Emma Thompson is the Anti Queen Moosilini (ITTDGY 2009)

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Did somebody say Antie Queen?
~

Another Kiwi said...

Always with the furry's

fish said...

Clegg probably doesn't even know Kilroy was here.