Friday, February 11, 2011

In Which Professional Sports Makes Us Say....Things

In future years this may be looked upon as the calm before the storm, for Westham United, yes that is them at the arse end of the Premier Football (soccer) League Table. "Oh" people might say "that was before the groundskeeper found "Denis Law's Big Book of Football Tips for Bigger Lads" and they started to play proper, like"
One thing is for certain, if they do say anything at the home ground of said professional sports circus, it will be in a  fecking big stadium.
One cannot imagine a finer setting for Westham to play their games against West Manglewurzel in the Shoemakers and Dungscrapers 2nd division (east) League which is where they will be by then. Whilst riding to the match on bicycles and living on boiled onions, the players will have a magnificent stadium to play in, emblazoned with corporate logos of failed finance companies. Along with witty localised signs such as "West Crew fucks dogs" and "Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaargg"
It is a truly glorious brave new world

9 comments:

BDR said...

Does keep Spurs in Tottenham which pleases everyone in Tottenham except Spurs' fuckugly owners, so yay!

Dr.KennethNoisewater said...

What is this...sports...you speak of?

Substance McGravitas said...

North American sports could really use the concept of demotion.

Mind you there are Canadian teams in most leagues.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Speaking as a Redskins fan, I request that Substance McGravitas' remark (IF that is his real name!) be stricken from the record.

Or perhaps, by trichinosis.
~

Hamish Mack said...

Thunder is unafraid of the banhammer

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

I have to rate for BCFC, or my friend Keith will give me a "Glascow Kiss". Needless to say, I hate the Villa, even though I've never been there:

If I had the wings of a swallow,
If I had the arse of a crow,
I'd fly straight on over the Villa,
And shit on the bastards below!

ckc (not kc) said...

Mind you there are Canadian teams in most leagues.

...for certain values of "Canadian", "teams", "most" and "leagues" ("are" and "in" may be granted, provisionally)

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I've been banhammered to such an extent that I welcome it.

It seems like home cooking.
~

mikey said...

Speaking as a long-suffering Giants fan I have a great deal of empathy and deep understanding for Kiwi's pain.

Speaking as a fan of the WORLD SERIES CHAMPION SAN FRANCISCO GIANTS, however, I have smirking condesention and make unpleasant, even disturbing armpit noises...