Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Insert Sexual Innuendo Title

When one has a conservative government, there are some things one expects to happen. Whacking the poor, unplugging the old, buttering up business, that sort of thing. Also and too, there will be pronouncements upon family values and some sort of pious claptrap about abortion.
Now the Tory/Lib-Dem coalition in The UK has a special place amongst the oppressive peoples of the world in terms of laying waste to a once semi-functional society.
But they have excelled themselves as they set a up a Sexual Health Committee tasked with advising the gubblememnt on factors involved in the ongoing pitching of woo. At Riddled enterprises we would gather a committee for such a task by getting folks who know of what they talk about. So might you, persevering reader.
Hah Hah! small thinkers! The Cameron/Clegg dynamic midfield combination instead goes for those who are opposed to the aims of the committee and would rather not talk about that sort of thing.
Of course this leads to such mischievous headlines as:
Coalition appoints pro-abstinence charity Life to key sexual health forum, while omitting British Pregnancy Advisory Service.
The Life group has also scored a seat on the Sex and Relationships Council alongside The Silver Ring Thing. The catchily named group is all about abstinence amongst the young folks.
It is a brave new world my friends!!!

26 comments:

Smut Clyde said...

In Richmond, south-west London, the Catholic Children's Society has taken over the £89,000 contract to provide advice to schoolchildren on matters including contraception and pregnancies

Fox, meet henhouse... Oh, I see you already know each other.

Another Kiwi said...

£89,000 will buy a lot of wooden rulers to whack kids with. I guess they could also get a poster that says "EVIL IS IN YOUR UNDERPANTS" for each kid too.

Substance McGravitas said...

Abstinence makes the hard go wander.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

This Ain't The Summer Of Love, AK.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Is there something about the stunning success of the US these last 30 years (15 trillion in debt, entangled in wars/occupations all over the globe, etc.) that makes the rest of the world decide:

Yeah, we need us some wingnuts in charge to eff everything up, too!
~

Smut Clyde said...

Shirley SubMcG meant "fondler".

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Yeah, we need us some wingnuts in charge to eff everything up, too!

No one wants to to be the last one off the cliff, thundra.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

OR: It could perhaps be the financial impact of ginormous, world spanning heartless corporate behemoths applying more and more financial leverage over ALL the levers of governance?

Just spitballin here.

Another Kiwi said...

I hope that the new policy continues and the next Road Transport Committee has airship manufacturers on it and the Medicines Committee has homoeopaths on it.
Teaching the argument, here.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Come to think of it, A.K., we need to put more Code Pink personnel in charge of our "Defense" Department.
~

Another Kiwi said...

I think that you just put the Republicans in charge of anything, they'll find a way to fuck it up

Smut Clyde said...

Medicines Committee has homoeopaths on it.

I wouldn't surprised if the Brits have actually done that.

Mentis Fugit said...

Smoot:
Shirley SubMcG meant "fondler".
Shirley you meant "fondle 'er".

w/v: bapinge - that has got to be apposite somehow

fish said...

more likely fondle 'im.

mikey said...

Form a committee! Appoint a hack!
Recruit some people who don't know jack!
THAT'll get us on the right track
And we'll all meet up in Fond du Lac!

tigris said...

FUCKING GOOGLE ATE MY COMMENT. Anyhoo, I would agree to homeopathic representation on medical boards, but for greatest potency it should be at 60X or higher dilution.

tigris said...

Also: insert sexual in YOUR endo.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

And we'll all meet up in Fond du Lac!

not if you've ever been to Fond du Lac.

mikey said...

Fond du Lac's right out, apparently
It's a place you go once, inherently
If you've been there with your parents, see
You'll have to meet in the Barents Sea

Another Kiwi said...

Or the Ross Dependencey

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Don't go to Fond du Lac
It's a place that's savage.
They'll stab you in the back
and your anus they'll ravage.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

But if you like that
don't let me hold you back
you might find your redneck mate
up there in old Fond du Lac.

mikey said...

The Barents Sea just can't replace old Fond du Lac of yore
It seems in Fond du Lac they like their cheese, but they like your butthole more
I'm all for dialog, I shirley am, I'm for establishing rapport
But I'd rather do so on the front porch swing than through that old back door

mikey said...

But if not Fond du Lac, nor the Barents Sea, where SHALL we then meet up?
And don't suggest Las Cruces, that's where I got beat up
Perhaps I'll just sit here on the couch, where I can put my old feet up
And I can reach a weapon or two if things begin to heat up

Smut Clyde said...

Anyhoo, I would agree to homeopathic representation on medical boards, but for greatest potency it should be at 60X or higher dilution.

I am all in favour of administering succussion to homeopaths.

Brando said...

And now, The Dirty Vicar Sketch.