Monday, February 13, 2012

Eggsystential threat.

What did I say? I said, "I'm going up North to see my aunty and I won't be around for a bit". I may not have actually said "Do not let the pixies get at the Green Ginger and Vinegar ointment" but surely that could be implied from my parting bon mot "Don't let the pixies get at the Green Ginger and Vinegar ointment'. Maybe I am wrong to trust tigris and Smut when I have to go and see Aunt Griselda. A lady whom life has been unkind to what with being turned into a newt, and only getting 1/2 better. She still cannot be beaten in the Across the Pool race for the Over- 60's but this is no real compensation for the eating flies etc.
But while I was gone the Green Ginger and Vinegar ointment was broached and eaten and threats and bellicose shouting occurred and the long and very short of it is the Pixie-Bantam wars of 2012.
Look at the ruined eggs and trampled lettuces already from this conflict. Lord knows what the writing ducks are going to report in the Mudville Times.

11 comments:

Smut Clyde said...

the Green Ginger and Vinegar ointment was broached and eaten and threats and bellicose shouting occurred

The Liniments of Satisfied Desire, as it were.

M. Bouffant said...

Kiwi has an Auntie Grizelda?

And Smut must be back on the liniment.

Good luck tigris.

Substance McGravitas said...

Look out pixies! They're flying over and behind you with the spears!

fish said...

but this is no real compensation for the eating flies etc.

You will catch more flies with the Green Ginger and Honey ointment.

fish said...

Eggsystential threat

The Dr. warned me if I didn't stop eating eggs, I would have to get a stent.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

A lady whom life has been unkind to what with being turned into a newt, and only getting 1/2 better.

She can always open up a half-million dollar line of credit at Tiffany's.

wiley said...

What kind of lay-about leaves Green Ginger and Vinegar ointment lying about as if it weren't potent and dangerous in the wrong hands. Wouldn't trust any of ya' with the doomsday device I have hidden in my cl----

oops

LOOK!!!!!! A CHICKEN!!!!

PS One more illegible proof of not robot display and I will unleash it.

mikey said...

Screwed up the meter. Lemme try again:

Half a newt
Tied up in jute
And balanced on a saucer
A bamboo shoot
In disrepute
The collected works of Chaucer

Those tiny feet
A grave conceit
Leave spatters on the bedding
In the county seat
A Whiskey. Neat.
And on to the the beheading

ckc (not kc) said...

...if I understood this post I would say that the rocks are clearly on the side of the geese, who will thus prevail
...but I don't

...so I won't

tigris said...

So this is why the pencils are covered in beak marks. SHEESH.

vacuumslayer said...

Even 1/4 Gingrich is too much. Your poor aunt.