Tuesday, March 6, 2012

When you get to the bottom, you go back to the top

Yes, indeed folks, New Zild continues Helter Skelter into the bright new future as brokered by our Conservative government and their enablers, the so-called opposition.
More good news for everyone concerning downgrading our overseas representation from delegations to free pens in a box at trade shows. It seems that there was a bit of spare cash floating about for swimming pool repairs and High Commissioner house repairs. Until the media found out about them and now they have been stopped. Which is only right seeing as about 300 jobs are going to go.
The government is not without feelings though and has got in a "Change Management" person (a snip at $340,000) who has, reportedly, advised soon to be ex-employees to
"Take a hot bath, pray, do yoga or get a pet'? Because, quote: 'a pet's love is unconditional'"
See they don't say what kind of pet so it's up to you, freedom of choice!
Just to prove that the government are not just anti public servant office workers they have frozen the police budget too.
I must say that I am surprised to see Police Association person Greg O'Connor not slipping in a call for more firearms for police. Maybe he will change tack and ask for companion animals.
All in all it's a bright new world.


18 comments:

fish said...

The Beatles are NOT BOC.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

See they don't say what kind of pet so it's up to you, freedom of choice!

Sea monkeys are a good choice for the budget conscious.
~

Anonymous said...

Take a hot bath, pray, do yoga OR get a pet?

I would reccomend doing all four.

vacuumslayer said...

At the same time? Well, perhaps if the yoga makes you stretchy enough...

Substance McGravitas said...

Because, quote: 'a pet's love is unconditional'"

Not if your pet is a Tory minister.

Laura said...

'a pet's love is unconditional'"

Not if it's a cat!

((Hugs))
Laura

vacuumslayer said...

Is laura saying Tory ministers are cats?

Laura said...

maybe.... :)

M. Bouffant said...

The Beatles are NOT BÖC.

This is not an argument you want to start.

Another Kiwi said...

I think Mrs Cat is a Tory. Luckily, not a minister yet.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Sea monkeys are a good choice for the budget conscious.

They could also be ground into a nutrient rich paste if you're desparately hungry!

Another Kiwi said...

BBBB is a monsta!! Grinding up one's little friends!
They would need some wasabi, I reckon

vacuumslayer said...

What?! I chuckled. And then I got hungry.

wiley said...

...a $900,000 upgrade of the swimming pool at the New Zealand embassy in Japan.

Wha?! Parading certain people through the streets so that the mob can throw things at them, spit on them, and call them names is starting to look sensible to me. It would be unembittering.

Oh yeah--- have you heard? The APA wanted to include a diagnosis of "excessive bitterness" in the DSM-5. They noticed a lot of their clients were bitter this decade and thought they might throw some drugs at it.

Mensch.

Smut Clyde said...

a diagnosis of "excessive bitterness"

Caused by too much IPA.

tigris said...

American Pale Ales aren't excessively bitter, they're just hopped up.

Also Sea Hanuman in the tub will cover several bases.

Also too cats are smarter than Tories. Hmm, plus they're stretchy and bathy...

tigris said...

Oooh, Smut makes me very angry, very angry indeed! /Marvin the Martian.

mikey said...

They noticed a lot of their clients were bitter this decade and thought they might throw some drugs at it.

Ok, I'll (grudgingly) admit that it hasn't worked to reduce my bitterness to this point, but that's no reason to end a perfectly reasonable experiment.

There are both substances and dosage levels that I have not tried. We could be THIS close (this is me, holding up my index finger next to my thumb and squinting somewhat myopically through the tiny gap) to a major breakthrough...