In the aftermath of the tremor we have received any number of anxious e-mails and texts**, so I should take this opportunity to reassure our readers that none of the delicately-poised Riddled research apparati was left misaligned any more than previously, and although the smooth aging of the Christmas Ale was disrupted, head brewer Space-Time Eddie was able to assuage its agitation by the adroit use of a brewer's technique known as "late ratting" where the details are beyond my ken. Material damage was limited to the collapse of the spacious West Wing Lean-to, otherwise known as the Insurance-rort Annex.
Also whose is the Rottweiler under the bed? Is today Bring-your-pet-to-work Day? Why no I do not believe it is.
* Just saying, some people's mental batteries are compact high density lithium-ion tech while others' are Voltaic stacks of copper / zinc / brine-soaked cardboard.
** for any number n < 3.