Monday, August 26, 2013

The things one learns with the Riddled time machine!

Crikey! Cutlery has certainly evolved no end since Ye Daies of Yore. Mainly it is smaller. Perhaps we have come to take the safety of meals for granted. What a contrast with the Renaissance, when people  took no chances when dealing with Eggs Benedict, or "Ye wiley-est opponent ye trencherman will mete" as Vegetius Renatus would have it.

The implements of fine dining were varied and specialised, to maximise the possibilities for social embarrassment from choosing the wrong one, e.g. a pho pas with the soup course. Here Vegetius shows an apprentice how to approach the humble broad bean. I think the fork doubled up as a musical instrument, hence the tuning pegs.

Inevitably, the Creative Anachronism crowd have revived the period cutlery when serving a Renaissance banquet. That's how we know that this is the right way to eat radicchio. They were not clear on the concept of "salad dressing" back then.

In the interests of domestic harmony and non-earhole-clipping I will not mention names, but someone thought it would be a classy idea to try this at lunch. Suffice to say that things are not going well and the baked-potato course is taking longer than we expected. Here I am calling my colleague Another Esq. Kiwi's attention to the fact that tigris is back at Riddled Manor waiting for dessert and will not be well-pleased with the delay, but he pays no heed to my remonstrations, any more than he paid the first time around when they were just monstrations.

9 comments:

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

They were not clear on the concept of "salad dressing" back then.

There were probably sumptuary laws regulating its use.

tigris said...

I like how the first one has wheel-scythes, in case the rest of the pack of flaming potatoes try to sneak up on you.

mikey said...

On the contrary, they appear to have dressed quite appropriately for salad...

tigris said...

The menu also claimed "codpieces" were "delightfully batter-fried morsels of fresh-caught fish" so now I would like to change my order.

Hamish Mack said...

Well excuuuuuse me if I want to be careful around dangerous vegetables. Can't trust the little bleeders is all I'm saying.
My word, we look good in those olden times clothes and especially the hats.

Smut Clyde said...

There were probably sumptuary laws

BBBB is bumfuzzled. A Sumptuary is of course a place where one stores old motor oil.

Sirius Lunacy said...

And those are just the salad forks. Dinner forks of that period were 40-60-%larger.

Substance McGravitas said...

40 to 60 percent lager sounds quite nice right now.

Dragon-King Wangchuck said...

What with all your playing about with things man was not meant to know, I suspect you've monstrated enough that they will always be remonstrations now. No matter how many demonstrations you engage in.