Monday, June 29, 2015

You're very clever, young man, but it's greater fleas and lesser fleas, all the way down

"Tell us more about GcMAF!" said absolutely no-one. But at Riddled we are steadfast in our determination to bring you nothing but the freshest, artisanal, hand-curated loons. Also I am in thrall to the power of Ira Dei the Dragon-onna-string and it compels me to blog about GcMAF, the panaceal glycoprotein extracted from human blood, requiring 100 lives to fill one bottle of Abrasax youth serum NO WAIT that was in "Jupiter Ascending".
Extraction process:
Requires large still
What makes GcMAF so irresistable is the way it encapsulates the whole world of predatory health grifting in microcosm. Which is to say, in macrocosm. Like the alchemists' elixir vitae, it is a panacea; but there is no formula, and no definition, and no chemical test to verify its presence in a product you might buy on-line. Thus it is hard to find a alt-health scammer who is not trying to put his own spin on the magical protein as a point of difference from the competition. A drug by the name of World without End WHOOPS the old problem is back with lyrics bleeding through from the Radio Riddled classic-rock broadcast, we really need better shielding around the cryopods.

Just look at these two websites. On the left, one touts GcMAF to Asian consumers. One could easily believe it to be a subsidiary or an authorised distributor of the FirstImmune youth-serum product featured on the right. Alas, the Asian site has merely cloned the FirstImmune web design and where they are sourcing their magical blood extract remains a matter for speculation. Here at Riddled Investigative Journalism we grieve to report backstabbing, chicanery and sharp practice in the skeezy health-grifting sector but we do not resile from our melancholy duty.

Close inspection reveals the site* to be owned by Infiniti Biomed, with agents in Singapore and Bangkok, which are the new Tijuana.

Even more obsessive closer attention uncovers an entire pullulating ecosystem of websites, connected secondarily by the details of who registered which domain. There is a stem sell, asitwere, Regenex Holdings (Thailand Ltd.), primordial and pluripotent and undifferentiated, potentially immortal as long as it remains unspecialised and based on Cayman Islands. Regenex sloughs other companies from its flanks in the manner of Abhoth or a Skwirl-shuggoth; these subdivide and differentiate, becoming increasingly specialised in stem-cell scammery / "aesthetic surgery" / "medical tourism" (or in "integrative cancer therapy" in the case of the Veritas Life cancer clinics in Bangkok).

Regenex spawned Regenerasia and Regentec, and then Global Stem Cells Group and Verita Healthcare and the Verita Life cancer clinic, and Global Medical Training Network which offers training for nurses for the stem-sell sector (on the theory that even if the stem-sell scammery money teat dries up there is still money to be made from people who aspire to a career in stem-sell scammery).

The primary connection among these companies is the presence of Richard DeAndrea as Medical Director of Infiniti Biomed and Medical Director of Regenetec and Medical Director of Stem Cells Thailand (a.k.a. Global Stem Cell Network) and Medical Director of Global Medical Services Group (which is now Verita Medical Services) and Medical Director at Verita Life Integrative & Regenerative Bio-Enhancement Center, because what better qualification could one ask for in one's oncologist than a Doctorate of Naturopathy? Before all that he was Holistic Health Director at TRIA Integrative Wellness Center; before relocating his operations from San Francisco to Bangkok he was noted for his alternative AIDS cures, Oxygen Bar and 21-Day Detox-related activities.**

We can only conclude that detoxes and stem cells don't work any more which is why the necessity for Gc-MAF, rather than its high profile. It may be that the Stars are In Alignment and a CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN scenario is just around the non-Euclidean corner.

In related news,
  • Classical homeopathy rarely works anymore.
  • Amalgam and root canal removal is still beneficial.
  • Cavitation surgery can still be big but is no longer a miracle.
  • Simple things that worked 30 years ago no longer work well.
However, Electromagnetic Smog still remains an issue so don't throw away those tinfoil hats Faraday Cages quite yet. We learn all of this from Dietrich Klinghardt, inventor of homeopathic GcMAF. This is all non-classical and quantum so perhaps it will save you when the old gods return and sweep our cities back into hell SODDING B.Ö.C. LYRICS. Dr Klinghardt has been the recipient of Respectful Insolence, but you should also look at his eccentric magisterium of thought, come back when you've finished. The power of Ira Dei the Dragon-onna-string compels you.

"But wait," the reader asks. "Wasn't 'homeopathic GcMAF' a specialty of Trevor Banks and Lesley Hutchings, a.k.a."

Sadly, there is a gnawing suspicion that not all of Trevor and Lesley's ideas are original to them, and not all their activities are entirely above-board. The Wayback Machine, for instance, contains a no-longer-extant website in which Trevor was offering "second generation GcMAF" to his customers, using the Japanese process, made in his own
sterile cell processing facility using this new and improved 2nd generation method which is 10-20 times more concentrated and is more active and stable than other GcMAF that is currently available
-- so much better than the product available from FirstImmune! This was back when FirstImmune was warning people against the Japanese 2nd-Gen product, as an untested and overpriced product of unknown provenance, conceivably the work of scammers. And when Trevor and Lesley were working for FirstImmune as Marketing Manager and intertube shill. It is the ingratitude and disloyalty that hurt.

A hypertrophied sense of duty obliges me to mention Jeremy Ayres (Doctor of Naturopathy), who was buying the FirstImmune product and re-selling it as his own --
Our GcMAF batches have been put through 9 tests, including 2 sterility, three activity/potency, we make time lapse videos of all live cancer cells being destroyed in three days.
-- while presenting his beach-house on sunny tropical out-of-jurisdiction Barbados as a partner to the FirstImmune cancer clinic in Switzerland.***
We have several clinic options available. For stage 3-4 conditions (or other terminal diagnosed conditions) it is best to go to the residential clinic in Switzerland.
Readers are already familiar with Dr Jeff Bradstreet, tireless autism grifter (if the first five remedies he sells you make no difference, do not despair, he has a sixth!). Bradstreet was sourcing the already high-diluted nanograms-per-dose GcMAF from FirstImmune, watering it down by another factor of 10 because Homeopathy!, and prescribing it to his patients along with a natural-chelator brain-enhancing jellyfish extract (I am not making this up). Earlier this year he decided to pretend that the association never happened and scrubbed his promotional website of all promises of GcMAF-related miraculous cures.

Alas, the Wayback Machine never forgets, and the FDA were not fooled. They interviewed Bradstreet, and seized records from his clinic, and he shot himself. Leaving his family so impoverished that his brother has been reduced to appealing to public donations for $25000, which will be spent on an independent investigation of Bradstreet's death. It would be VERY WRONG to go to the GoFundMe page (or to TruthNutNews) and leave a comment arguing that Bradstreet's attempts to detoxify his site show that he was BEING PRESSURED and AFRAID OF RETRIBUTION.

Poison's in my bloodstream, poison's in my pride
I'm after rebellion, I'll settle for lies
* Also promoted in antisocial media or whatever the kids are calling it:

** Further information can be found at the self-penned modestly-titled blog "Dr. Richard DeAndrea continues to make great advances in stem cell therapy". Connoisseurs of fulsomery will also appreciate DeAndrea's Whackyweedia entry, which is more fulsome than Johnny Cash at Fulsome Prison, and did not survive the critical attention of the Whackyweedia moderators.

*** Now closed on account of its illegality and of patient deaths.


JP said...

But Uncle Smut, what does Hypno-Squirrel have to do with all of this?

Smut Clyde said...

First you must invite Squirrel-Shuggoth into your heart. *Then* all will become clear.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Squirrel-Shoggoth needs no invitation to enter your heart, you won't be needing that sternum anyway.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

"Speedy deletion Wiki"

A brand new world for me to explore!

Smut Clyde said...

En route to Japan right now so if there are few posts over the next few weeks it is not because of abduction by the agents of Big Snake-oil.

JP said...


Smut Clyde said...

In retrospect it was a bad idea to wear my Rogue Beers "Dead Guy" cap onto the plane, as security screeners are even more than usually amped up about suicide bombers.

rhwombat said...

"Agents of Big Snake Oil"?

ckc (not kc) said...