Sunday, July 3, 2016

The Huge Manatee

We, here at the Riddled Institute of International Politics and Polychete Skin Mitochondria Analysis are always quite interested in that reservoir of electoral infection by RWNJ, Australia (hereafter known as The Fuckitude).
This last weekend the good folks of Aus have been doing the election Hokey Cokey and have, indeed, shaken it all abart. Not content with rejecting the current Morons-in-power, they have rejected the opposition as well, leaving Aus in the "Somalia scenario" of not actually, technically, in the sense of having  elected one recently, having a government.
Many Australians are unconcerned by this and continue on their daily rounds, unaware of the futility of their tasks while no government is there to scare them with stories of  invasions by Musselmen and/or starving brown skinned persons. I mean what is the point, people, if someone wearing an ethnic beanie doesn't cause you to wet yourself when they get on your bus???
Now, of course, Aussietrailya is well supplied with persons of sound mind and good heart and some of them may have sneaked past the politics filters (Penny Wong) and been elected (god knows what is going on over there) but some of the more "colourful" characters of recent times have shambled back into parliament, particularly into the senate, where underpants being worn on the head will soon become So Last Year. These are people who would be kicked out of North Carolina for being a bit "old fashioned".
All of this is of some concern to the reigning Prime Monster, Malcolm Turnbull, who gave a wonderfully spiteful and "it wasn't my fault" non-victory speech at 1am on Sunday morning. Never was a chap in more need of a cup of tea and a lie down.
But he will not get one since the counting of votes and configuring of Who You Meant To Vote For enters the Byzantine realms of the Australian Electoral Commission. Abandon hope hope all ye who enter there and remember to take some choccy biscuits for Ceberus, artificial sweeteners please, as he is watching the diet.
I have a theory, which is mine, that The AEC does not want to pay overtime to the scribes and thus cannot start back on the counting until Tuesday. Which is, according to newspapers in Nastyralia, worse than Hitler.
Interestingly the ruling Liberal/ National arsehole party have begun to fall out with two of their biggest and best journalistic bottom wipers, Andrew Bolt and Alan Jones. Truly the end times are upon us. Mr.Jones got called a "grub" on national TV on election night by an MP and Bolt is calling for Turnbull to be made into soap, I think.
The current state of play is that the so-called Left is two seats ahead of the Rightly Right with 13 seats undecided. If those undecideds go the way that the Aust. Broadcasting Corporation predicts it will  be tied on 72 seats each and they need 76 to win. Thus the hand-rubbing with glee of the Independent MPs. Those normally go with the Right so I would expect that Australia is in for 4 more years of Scummy government. I could be wrong, I could be right (J.Lydon).
Which is kinda the point here since both major parties are pledged to continue the barbaric treatment of migrants. Yeah there was talk of Medicare being dismantled and cold showers being compulsory but in the end, same ole same ole for the most vulnerable.
It is all a bit much but will, at least, keep Mr. First Dog on the Moon in regular employment.


Smut Clyde said...

The current state of play

Looking over at the ABC site I see that they have an inclusive policy of hiring head-injury patients as political editors, thereby explaining Chris Uhlmann. He tries to squeeze the swing from Coalition to Labor into the Bothsidesdoit framework, and ends up claiming that Labor support is "still at historic lows", i.e. lower than it's ever been apart from those elections that Labor lost.

Yes, the Coalition may have fucked the football but the rules oblige Mr Uhlmann to conclude that Labor must have screwed the chicken to the same extent ("Labor's gains do not disguise the pressure it is under on left and right").

Another Kiwi said...

"Labor's "Mediscare" campaign was outrageous but it worked because the Coalition had provided field evidence that people had a reason to be afraid."- Mr Uhlmann.
This was outrageously correct! Funnily enough both sides did not do that getting things right bit.
That lowest support evah line came from Sot Morrison on Saturday night. If you can't beat their worst performance evah, maybe you should STFU about it. But whatz do I know?

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Neil Farage (IF that his real name) has joined BoJo in retirement (leadership-unwise) at the original colonies-creator.

So all is wellfornought, or some-such.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

This is central to my point (which is on top of my head, where it belongs).

rhwombat said...

Thanks for the sympathy towards we poor benighted West Islanders. I suspect that the AEC takes perverse pleasure in extending the count in revenge for our compulsory voting (a trait we share with Argentina, Brazil (literate only!), Cyprus, Ecuador, Gujarat, Lichtenstein, Luxembourg, North Korea, Nauru (AKA Gulag 1), Peru, Singapore, and Uruguay - Hmmmm - there is a pettern emerging here), which stuff up perfectly good Saturdays every 3 years or so. Prey for us.
PS what's with the cats of Timaru?

Smut Clyde said...

HA HA New Zeald has the bestest headlines.
Thousands of burning washing machines still at large

rhwombat said...

SC: Hang on. Are you suggesting a link between unpatriotic washing machines and the disappearing cats of Timaru. Personally I'd be more inclined to blame militant Keas, or cycling Smeagol (AKA Toady Rabbott, ex PM of Oz), but I s'pose that self-immolating furrin' washing machines going feral in the hills - like possums or deer would be more dire.

Another Kiwi said...
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