Monday, May 6, 2019

On the Internet no-one knows you're a dog barking mad

Enquiring minds want to know more about the JBR Health Education & Research Organisation, or society, or whatever. For its footprint on the Interlattice betrays few clues as to the activities of this nebulous body.
JBR Health Education and Research Organization

CEO and President: Prof. (Dr). B. Rai
CTO and Chief: Dr. J. Kaur
COO and Vice President: Dr. H. Singh
Directors: Prof. Marc Watt, Prof. Peter Jensen, Er. Charles Lewis, DR. Kirk Horlbeck ,Prof. B.K. behera
Patron: Prof. S.C. Anand

JBR Group Leaders:
... 19.Dr. Alexvier Gulyaeva, JBR Transcriptomics, Russia
20.Prof. John F,JBR Proteomics, Germany
21.Dr. Frederic, JBR Genomics, Romania
22.Prof. H.O.Griefa, JBR Protein and Lipid, Ireland
23.Dr. Alexander, JBR Bioinformatics, Sweden
24.Prof. Srdjan Djurovic, JBR Lipid Science and Technology, Norway
25.Prof. Louis Fontain, JBR Cardiology, USA
26.Prof. Erosa Elgebaly, JBR Heart Diseases, New Zealand
27.Prof. Sara Badia, JBR Hypertension, Spain ...
114 Group Leaders are listed for academic specialties ranging from Agriculture to Quantum Technology, but many are fabricated or identity-stolen. It may be that JBR is an acronym for "Just Balwant Rai", for the only person actually flaunting his membership as an academic affiliation, and basking in the group's reflected glory, is a certain Balwant Rai - CEO and President; also journal editor, conference entrepreneur and Space Dentist.

Really, Uncle Smut? Is this going to be another of your interminable tales of "Incorrigible fabulists who flourish in the Interweave because their mental failings mesh so well with the imperatives of social media"?

Oh yes, and I admit that "Space Dentist" sounds like one of Hawkwind's more regrettable live albums. Or perhaps an out-take from Bob Calvert's album "Captain Lockheed & The Starfighters", and even now I am mentally changing the lyrics of the second track to "Aero-Space-Age Amalgam".

In that connection, let me dispel the popular misconception that "Crown of Creation" was a Jefferson Airplane concept album about dental prosthetics and cosmology.

But Professor (Doctor) Mr Balwant Rai is not just any incorrigible fabulist. As well as his dress-up games as Orbital Orthodontist, he has erected a magnificent pleasure-dome of fantasy, a world of titles and honours in which he is "Associate Professor, Faculty of Earth & Life Sciences, Kepler Space Institute" and "Program Director and Associate Professor of Aeronautic Dentistry at KSI", although the actual Kepler Space Institute seem unaware of his status there. Returning Mr Rai (or BR) to the forefront of attention, and citing an earlier Riddledpost in the process, Elisabeth Bik has been reading and commenting on his academic corpus. Suffice to say for now that his methods are unsound and his numbers are made up.

Will there be a moral?
Oh yes, a moral the likes of which even God has never seen.

When we first met BR, he was the JBR Conference Group, pimping mockademic congresses aboard the Copenhagen / Oslo ferry vessels... such as the 4th World Silage Conference, 22nd-24th March 2018 (the first three having failed to exhaust the scholarly potential of silage), and the 4th World Citrus Conference & Expo (when I think of citric fruit like oranges and grapefruit and kumquats, my mind jumps at once to the Baltic straits).
"We are best at every conference"
"We are always perfect at our mission"

Now these ferries are a splendid institution. They are popular with Danes jaunting up to Norway to enjoy the unfamiliar experience of "hilly", and who travel overnight both ways because a cabin is still cheaper than accommodation in Oslo (possibly excepting a dormitory bunk in the Anker Hostel). Using Baltic ferries as scamference venues is innovative, though it is not clear whether credit for the innovation belongs to BR in Denmark or the Sweden-based Ashutosh Tiwari of IAAM. Here at Riddled it inspired us to hold our own Orbis-Tertius Congress of Experimental Ethics on the upper deck of a double-decker bus (as a change from the Wigglesworth Lounge at the Old Entomologist), but meanwhile BR has dropped the luxury-cruise aspect.

His mockademic events receive the imprimatur and support of the US Department of Veterans' Affairs. Yeah right. Also supported by Open Research Hub; World Dental Network; StudentJobNet; Incudent ["the natural way of dental health"]; and the Journal of Dento-Medical Science & Research... which is to say, other manifestations of BR's entrepreneurial imagination, propping each other up in a network of aspirational grift, with web-domains generally registered by his regular co-author and co-scammer Jasdeep Kaur. This is really sad now. It is a vertiginous glimpse into an entire self-referential, self-sustaining alternative universe ... possibly constructed by Philip K. Dick, though I don't know if Dick would ever have coined such barbaric neologisms as "Incudent" and "Medivents".

Which is a good point to note that the JBR Health Education & Research Society has extended its ambitions and morphed into the JBR Institute of Health Education Research & Technology, and acquired a FaceBorg page of its own. Alas, it is a barren ghost-town of a page, home to coyotes and tumbleweeds, and a couple of posts trying to sign up suckers for the World Dental Network.

Going back to the Journal of Dento-Medical Etc. this did exist... as a short-lived spigot with a single issue in 2013, emanating from Pee-Pee Publisher [I am not making this up]. The Prospectus provides an alternative title - "JBR International Medico-Dental Science and Technology, a journal of the JBR research group" - because of course it does. Whatever its title, the ephemeral entity lingers on to bestow its aura of credibility upon JBR income-related activities.

But journal management is like mopping up elephant poop Show-business: both are hard to forsake. So we find BR at the editorial helm of a number of journals, competing for the custom of the space-dentistry research community. Notably, from the SciDoc cockwombles, the JBR Journal of Translational Space Dentistry, Medicine and Exploration (JBR-TSME) - the flagship of a little flotilla of JBR-branded trash-spigots. And the JBR Journal of Interdisciplinary Medicine and Dental Science, from the lowlife garbage people at OMICS.

Continuing the general theme, one could also count the Journal of Aeronautics & Aerospace Engineering (though it has lost the JBR brand)... though nominally extruded by "Longdom", a new parasitical publisher / conference scammer on the scene, Longdom is just another OMICS polyp embracing various imprints (rebranded to shake off the fraud-stink, while providing an outlet for academic failures who don't want the reputational damage of being seen to publish in OMICS' journal-shaped jizz-mops).

Anyway, BR's rich fantasy life reaches its acme with JBR University. Motto: "It is a long established fact that a reade." This presents itself as a kind of on-line knocking-shop or middle-man, putting would-be tutors in touch with would-be tutees who want the quality of their on-line education guaranteed by a couple of conmen of no fixed abode. Evidently the web designer felt that the text sounded better in the original Lorem Ipsum.

"Thousand of instructors" are claimed, but only one course... in Computer Science, I grieve to report, not in Space Dentistry.

All these aspirational-grifting pretensions of academic acceptance sound pathetic beyond words. But confident bullshit counts for a lot in our wonderful post-truth post-reality reality. BR did blag his way into Dutch dental-school academia for a while, and into the network of Mars-simulation enthusiasts who seal themselves into caravan-sized capsules to test their manned-mission endurance. He convinced actual researchers to co-sign the studies critiqued in Pubpeer threads (with implausibly repetitive numbers, purportedly collected in those confinement exercises). And people signed on to be Directors of that vaporware JBR University! Some of them are regulars from BR's mockademic scamferences.

It seems that no self-deceptive Walter Mitty fantasist is too inept to fail as an Interlattice scammer.

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