Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Fake insects in sex

Is this how the aliens are outbreeding us??

Australia's sexually deceptive Cryptostylis Tongue Orchids lure pollinators by mimicking the signals of female insects. Male insects are convinced into mating with orchid flowers and they unwittingly collect & distribute the orchid pollinia (see pollination in action via YouTube). Cryptostylis orchids are so persuasive that pollinators ejaculate and waste copious sperm on the flowers

That's a little more information than we really needed.

13 comments:

fish said...

Gilding the lilly.

Sperming the orchid.

Not quite the same ring to it.

Smut Clyde said...

Sez here that Cryptostylis subulata and its pollinating wasp are "now firmly established in swamps of the Far North". Typical Aussies... invading NZ, and then settling in swamps...

I see that the Small Duck Orchid or Paracaleana minor is "An Australian vagrant".

Oh look, yet another Aussie immigrant, this one wearing tongue studs. No pollinator in NZ, so "it does spread vegetatively".

Here at Riddled we are always happy to confirm your anti-Australian stereotypes.

Smut Clyde said...

Consider the orchids of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not covered in so much wasp bukkake.

Jennifer said...

LOL!

An Ichneumon Wasp said...

I was led to believe that there is porn on the Internet.

Substance McGravitas said...

After being tricked many times, I have learned to deny comely flowers my essence.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

At least our dear North American insects aren't used so ruthlessly:

Unlike deceptive orchids, U.S. Trillium species provide their pollinators with a nectar reward.

mikey said...

No surprise here.

Happens to me all the time...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I was led to believe there is intelligence on the internet.

Mostly, I find Monty Python references and insanity.

So, I kind of feel at home....

Another Kiwi said...

Not only is there intelligence it is designed intelligence!11one
For did not the Supreme Watootsi look upon the poor sad orchids of the forest and say "You should get jiggy with the insecks, this will lead to pollination and the invention of Kleen-wipes"

Smut Clyde said...

As a male browser across the Intertubas, I feel perfectly entitled to make fun of wasps that waste their sperm on meretricious images disguised as an available mate.

fish said...

Imagine my chagrin when the park ranger explained to me that it only works on insects.

Smut Clyde said...

see pollination in action via YouTube

I looked pollination up and it does not in fact use YouTube at any point in the process.
There was a lot of stigma involved, however.