Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Is it about a cyclamen?

Here in this far-off land of wonder and enchantment the vegetation includes the tree nettle, Urtica ferox, which is basically a stinging nettle that's evolved into a small tree and kills people, and tree daisies like Olearia spp. which are indeed daisies that have evolved into small trees and get in the way when you're tramping. And then there are tree orchids which HA HA FOOLED YOU are epiphytes. Though they are not obligate branch-dwellers, and seem to thrive on the forest floor if they end up there when a branch breaks off or a tree falls over or they are brought down by the invidious workings of the "tall orchid syndrome" or "great Kiwi clobbering machine".*

Of the various species of tree orchid, Earina autumnalis is the one in flower at the moment. And very nice it is too. The flowers have a strong aroma rather like toilet freshener, and rather like someone has dropped a whole bottle of vanilla essence; or to put it in terms you'll understand, like a combination of GD gas (Soman), CA gas (Camite) and CN gas (CAP).

Also spotted a pygmy tree orchid (Ichthyostomum pygmaeum) today. This makes me proud enough and I will not get up in the morning for any sergeant, for it is an inconspicuous wee plant with leaves up to 1 cm long growing out of little pseudobulbs like wrinkled dried peas but smaller.

Also of note in the NZ flora is the dirigible cyclamen. In the picture the breeze is blowing one across a bay. The people below in the castle gate are looking rather concerned at the prospect of its roots lodging in the castle walls, for they can widen cracks and do no end of damage to the stonework.

Here's a painting of a dirigible cyclamen by Brent Wong, but I have to say that he's made a bit of a dog's breakfast of it, and it doesn't look very convincing to me.

* Not to be confused with ZRM's "Wingnut processing machine".

7 comments:

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Would it be safe to assume that death-nettles would not be suitable for making soup?

I miss my delicious, delicious nettle patch- but I have convinced a coworker to give me all the purslane she weeds out of her garden this year.

Substance McGravitas said...

Hate's California, it's cold and it's damp.
That's why the daisy makes you tramp.

Substance McGravitas said...

Minus the apostrophe for fuck's sake.

Substance McGravitas said...

The first one.

Substance McGravitas said...

Christ.

mikey said...

But ultimately, my dear Substance, you raise a perfectly legitimate question, and one which will be difficult to answer authoritatively, to wit: Is the "sake" to which you refer the personal possession of fuck, making it fuck's sake, or is there simply more than one fuck, in which case the plural "fucks" might more accurately apply.

There are far better grammarians available here who will claim the authority to provide an unequivocal answer, but until I can interview sake and fuck fecking fuck I'm going to remain agnostic on the whole "fuck's/fucks" conundrum...

Smut Clyde said...

I tried some rice wine at Hashigo Zake the other day but it didn't do much for me. Fuck sake.