Sunday, June 20, 2010

Gardening with AK

Smut has not been posting his popular gardening segment due to various FASCIST RULES, MAN about what you can grow, IN YOUR OWN GARDEN. So I checked out the vege patch at Chez Kiwi to see what nature has provided and, lawks a mercy, iffen it is not Orbs ripening time again.

As you can see the outer levels are still quite soft even though the harvest is near. To this end it is about time to apply "Hardening creme" which is available from "Holding the Sausage Curiosity Shoppe". Similarly you can see that harvesting the orb at this stage can lead to damage in the Central medulla or "Satan's Spit"  in the middle of the orb, the tendrils that develop into the mind control extensions are not fully developed yet and need a couple of weeks in the orb patch to form the right "Vinegars and Pisses" as old time orb growers call the psychotropic juices.
In this particular specimen there are several globular clusters that the old-timers call "the Grummits" which develop into extra cellular proteinase and delamination spheres.
But this little beauty needs to stay in the garden for a while longer before it can be used to enslave the neighbours/bors
Next Week: What to do with the bodies.

10 comments:

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

To this end it is about time to apply "Hardening creme" which is available from "Holding the Sausage Curiosity Shoppe".

A VPR, if ever there was!

mikey said...

SIGH....

It's just all the Same!

y'know?

mikey

Smut Clyde said...

Do not eat those funny mushrooms from the rubbish heap. Smut is currently non compost mentis.

Smut Clyde said...

Next Week: What to do with the bodies.

Oh oh I know that story -- "Earth to Earth" (a.k.a. "The Steinpilz Method") by Robert Graves.

Unknown said...

It's OK to love that thing ay?

forim, not for her.

tigris said...

I love currant events columns.

Another Kiwi said...

They give me raisin to live

Unknown said...

It's all written down in the Age Of Raison. (sorry David Sylvian).

gessr, he was no knower.

M. Bouffant said...

"Spit" or Split? Works either way, but ...

Smut Clyde said...

The pretty pitcher reminds me of the old pre-Plate Tectonics pore theory of mineral formation.