Lonely teardrops, we've been crying

Tuesday lunchtime, from a recently bought-out political party now operating from the boardroom of a firm of corporate lawyers who regularly act as conduit for press releases from the Business Roundtable:

[Don] Brash also confirmed that Hide would retire from Parliament at the next election, rather than seek a place on ACT's list or seek to remain in Parliament.

[...]

Brash announced the changes in a boardroom at Chapman Tripp in Wellington today saying he was unable to make the announcement at Parliament because he was "not legally allowed" to hold a press conference there, because he was not a Member of Parliament.

Hide was rolled as leader last week after Brash described him as toxic and a liability to ACT.

Brash had also made it clear that he did not want Hide to retain his ministerial portfolios. He said yesterday that he changed his mind because Hide had important legislation to get through Parliament.

[...]

But Brash could not name one of the pieces of legislation.

And here at the palatial Riddled offices it was all sad faces and red eyes and tears before bedtime because a political future without Rodney Hide's special brand of hilarity would be a sadly impoverished one. For Don Brash had declared that his old friend Hide's "brand was toxic" so he must go. It all seems to be about branding more than ideology from his perspective, though it never became clear whether Don's preferred symbol was a Lazy 8 or a Double Cross.

The only consolation is the entertainment value in watching how the electorate reacts in the coming election to the present clown-car pile-up. Will they see the Brash buy-out as an admirable show of strength, as the journalists seem to think, rather than as a display of disloyalty, untrustworthiness, back-stabbing and naked opportunism? (clowns with road-rage should not be trusted with knives and should definitely not be allowed to strip naked). Though as a friend pointed out to me at the pub last night -- he was buying a pint, so I had to listen to his opinions -- it doesn't really matter what 95% of the voting population think of the ACT party, since their sole objective is to win support from all 5% of the crazy raving sociopath demographic as opposed to the mere 2% they are currently receiving in polls.

But wait, a few hours later, Hide's promise to stand down at the election is no longer operative!

Rodney Hide hopes to be around as an MP after the election even though he told ACT's new leader Don Brash that he'd quit at the election.

Dr Brash agreed to keep him in Cabinet until then. Today, Mr Hide's ever hopeful of staying on as an MP.

"Well what I said to Don Brash was clearly I didn't have his support and that I wouldn't stand if I didn't have the leader's support but it's my intention to persuade him that I've got a lot to contribute," he says.

An outside observer might well think that Hide had been promised a well-paid job made specially for him if he would quietly go away and cease to stink the place up, but belatedly he has realised what a strong bargaining position he has -- not to mention how much money there is behind the new owners of ACT -- so he is holding out for a better offer.

So our tears are dried and it is back to the Old Entomologist with high spirits for a night of "Origins of Eusociality among the Hymenoptera" Trivia!