Tuesday, August 30, 2011

From the Nominal Determinism file

S. Marc Breedlove is perhaps best-noted for his pioneering work in the "2nd-digit / 4th-digit" finger-length index as a predictor of sexual orientation.

I can only imagine how many hours he had to spend watching videos from the top shelf while researching Differences in Finger Length Ratios Between Self-Identified “Butch” and “Femme” Lesbians. "There's her hand in sight! Freeze the frame while I measure finger lengths!"

12 comments:

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

T

- $arah Palin

Smut Clyde said...

T = Testosterone, Mr Thundra.

The paper in question probably has some good stuff in it, but the authors don't do themselves any favours by citing LeVay's fraudulent 1991 study on gay / straight neurology as their 2ND FECKIN' REFERENCE. Then they go on to cite Hamer's 1993 claim to have found the chromosomal locus of homosexuality (but not any of the later studies that couldn't replicate it). Mine eyes, I roll them.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Heh, measuring finger lengths.

Substance McGravitas said...

If there are twins invulvad I am reading that study no mater WHAT you say.

Smut Clyde said...

I see your deliferate misteak Mr Substance.

Twin study.

Gentlewoman said...

First author is a putz and you're blabbing on about Breedlove (who must, I think, be a very silly person)?

Typical. Ignore the phallus in the room and focus on the lesbian porn.

Wait...were we ever married? Where were you in August of 1991, hmmm?

If you have an engineering degree and were ever in the US Navy, I'm calling my lawyer. You never paid a dime for all that scuba gear.

Smut Clyde said...

Dr Puts, from the Putz Lab, is a student of Breedlove.
I can easily imagine the pr0n video that goes with this plot summary. White lab coats and little else. Test-tubes and strange retorts.

Actually the strange retorts come from Another Kiwi after he's had a pint or two, but I digress.

tigris said...

White lab coats and little else.

Bow-chicka-bow-wow

M. Bouffant said...

This is apparently quite popular at the L.A. Times; it appears in an "In Case You Missed It ..." sidebar almost every time I want to do the crossword or check the sports page.

You may be sure I won't be undergoing any anesthesia when there are Korean croakers near me.

As might be expected from the Times, there's a celebrity angle as well. Kelsey Grammer is a pindick!

I didn't click either prior to being exposed to it here, but now, in an effort to help w/ your research, I'm obsessed w/ my fingers.

Are we talking relative length, absolute length, what? I can make the "ring" finger much longer w/ a slight contortion of my wrist. (Not limp!!)

Sincerely,
Confused in L.A.

M. Bouffant said...

Anyway, thought it was this Breedlove, or I wouldn't've looked.

Smut Clyde said...

You may be sure I won't be undergoing any anesthesia when there are Korean croakers near me.
...
A second team member then measured penis length immediately after the subject had been anesthetized. The length was measured both when the penis was flaccid and when it had been stretched as much as possible.

Not seeing much mention there of 'consent'. No wonder Western science is falling behind, when we handicap ourselves with these quaint notions of "ethics"!

mikey said...

"...stretched as much as possible..."

Hmm.

When Mitsubishi was developing the zero fighter in the 1930s, they had some of the elite navy pilots undertake some "destructive testing" whereby they would put them through a series of increasingly radical maneuvers until the wings tore off. Many of them survived these tests.

I guess it's the "as possible" qualifier that has me somewhat aflutter here. Really no reason they should eschew the use of a five horsepower bumper winch, except perhaps some kind of restraint. They don't seem to indicate if there was any requirement for the penis under measurement to retain it's functionality, nor even that it remain attached.

Excuse me, I need to go update my Power of Attorney...