Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Shoes that no man would want to wear

You can tell this painting was copied from a scene in an Edward Gorey story. Mistaken identity, tragic death... and look at the dogs in the background...
Pixies: Otherwise engaged
I was shaken out of my well-earned post-prandial power nap in the emergency back-up broom closet with the news that the rift in the temporal / spatial continuum had opened up again. And one might well respond that according to their employment contracts, it was the library pixies' job to maintain chronological consistency within the ambit of the Riddled Archives, but a fat lot of attention they pay attention to one.

So it was all hands to the tachyon pump, for values of "all hands" that consist of "mine", owing to Another Kiwi resting his eyes in the #1 Broom Closet (it locks from the inside) while tigris was engaged in vital research that involved shopping for two-way shoes.*

Our first edition of Gorey's 'Sopping Thursday' slipped through the rift -- evidently all the way back to 1495 -- before I could rectify the tachyon imbalance. That's my story, anyway, and I am confident that the insurance company will believe it.


* Advantages are (a) No-one can tell from the footprints which way you're going; (b) When one end wears through the sole you turn them around and keep walking; and (3) No-one knows if your feet face the wrong way.
Two-way shoe FAIL

8 comments:

Hamish Mack said...

Tigris has a good health care plan

tigris said...

This morning I dreamt I had slippers that were hollowed out pickles. This can only mean someone slipped some wormwood beer into my sleeping draught.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Hollowed out pickle shoes?

Sounds like something Pinko Punko would wear. Or wish he'd bought, anyways.
~

Hamish Mack said...

Crivens! look at the mess the Pixies have made of wall with their wretched "Ooga-ball" I don't know why we agreed to let them have their stupid Wreckcreation centre. Well, I do actually, it was the lakes of fire and rabid Badger plague they promised.
Little feckers

Smut Clyde said...

slippers that were hollowed out pickles.

I'm sure you can buy those from Archie McPhee's.
I don't remember lending the Riddled Dream machine to Archie McPhee's; AK has some splaining to do.

Substance McGravitas said...

One set of D&D dice lost in the time machine and everyone goes bananas about pyramids. How they wound up with a square base I do not know.

Hamish Mack said...

owing to Another Kiwi resting his eyes in the #1 Broom Closet (it locks from the inside) And yet BC#1 has a Chaise Longue in it and smells of Mrs. Miggins Long Shag Tobacco...Hmmm
It has snacks and drinks too. Woo hoo #1,#1!!!

Hamish Mack said...

I'm sure you can buy those from Archie McPhee's.
Tigris might want to check out her hands, too