Monday, January 16, 2012

Staving off the Darkness

Thundra tells me that Wikipedia is going off line for to protest about the U.S. government not liking the internet. Or some such.
Thus grasping the bull between a rock, Riddled will begin it's own compendium of useful information, much as the Irish monks copying out manuscripts in them olden days before there was cell phones.
1) The highest capital in the world is the H in the Hollywood sign. It fell from heaven's gate on any given Sunday in a galaxy far, far away.
2) Many parts of the world are joined together. This appears to have been badly planned what with the history of some of these places, e.g. France and Germany, Russia and everybody and Alaska and Canada. Some countries of the world are surly holdouts and not connected to others. I blame their parents.
3) T.E Lawrence was in a movie with camels. The Sopwith Camel was a World War One fighter plane. Lawrence and the Sopwith Camel are both no longer in production or dead. Coincidence???
4) Cats do not care too much for agriculture. Many cats are unmoved by explanations as to why it would be better, if they are going to catch birds,  it was Blackbirds they caught not Thrushes. Yes the Thrush is a silly bird but it eats snails, Blackbirds kick mulch from arsehole to breakfast around.
5) One of the least combustible elements is water. No one ever called their funk/rock band. Earth Wind Fire and Water. Yes they just stopped at Fire. This does not explain Toad the Wet Sprocket.

Phew, time for a break. This preventing the dark Ages is hard work

43 comments:

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

High School students' production of report papers will come to a STANDSTILL.

Substance McGravitas said...

What's the deal with airline food? I can't get a straight answer from lazy comedians.

Undare!

tigris said...

Nothing about how corvids have learned to sled. If they band together with the polydactyl cats WE ARE DOOMED.

Another Kiwi said...

Jeff Corwin has learnt to sled! This must go into the "Living People" section.
Airline food will go in the "Everyone's a fecking Critic" section

Rachel said...

alternate title suggestion:

Daving off the Starkness

Another Kiwi said...

I'm sorry I can't let you do that Dave.

Smut Clyde said...

Are there Youtubers of crows riding around on Roombas? I THINK NOT.

Smut Clyde said...

them olden days before there was cell phones.

I demands the Leibowitz-Canticle app!

Kathleen said...

Daving off the Starkness

too GRRM

Kathleen said...

new entry: Collective Nouns
A Pod of Whales
A Roomba of Crows

tigris said...

I demands the Leibowitz-Canticle app!

What would it do? Produce illuminated circuit diagrams? Require monks on a treadmill to make the screen so bright it'll give you first degree burns? Warn you that Lucifer has fallen?

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I hadn't thought of using a stick to whack the dark.

Until now. Thank you, Riddled.
~

vacuumslayer said...

Also too: Martin Luther King was a conservative.

One of the least combustible elements is water. No one ever called their funk/rock band. Earth Wind Fire and Water. Yes they just stopped at Fire.


The music industry is made up of a bunch of moistists!

PS--that made me laugh. Not my comment, yours

fish said...

I can do an entry on crypt orchids.

Another Kiwi said...

Oh crypt orchids! I'm sure that'll be a page turner. We want punch and Pissass here.

Von said...

#5 is likely my favorite thing ever written.
EVER

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

well, I might as well just stop writing posts then, shall I Von.

IT'S YOUTUBERS ALL THE WAY DOWN.

Smut Clyde said...

The Chinese tribute band is called Metal Water Wood Fire and Earth.

Smut Clyde said...

Also too I have some orchid foteaux to upload some time. Simpliglottis cornuta is my favourite.
Crypt orchids? In NZ we have spider orchids. Jennifer would find this helpful.

Jennifer said...

Is Staving Off Darkness, like BG's band, Dark Dankness? Or was her name Dank Darkness? I don't remember.

Dragon-King Wangchuck said...

New entry:

Josiah Jedediah Hatrack Whore Ass Man Cantrall is like, totally a big time journamalism d00d what with teh one time he proved that all union members are evil aliens that want to eat your livers and have interspecies badonkings with your sister.

OT - best wv EVAR! angstin

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Are there Youtubers of crows riding around on Roombas? I THINK NOT.

They just don't have sufficient incentive- perhaps a dead squirrel on the Roomba would suffice.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Are there Youtubers of crows riding around on Roombas? I THINK NOT.

Alternate joke- you're lookin' for a rookba.

Smut Clyde said...

The ruum-ba is looking for you!

Mentis Fugit said...

There's no way I can run off 40 pounds before that thing catches me.

mikey said...

Hopefully there will be time to preserve other critical information, such as the ingredient list for Enzyte™ Male Enhancer and an overview of Cottage Cheese recipes before the darkness comes...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

dammit, all I can find in my hard drive is Cheese Cottage.

Another Kiwi said...

Mmmmmmm cheese cottage!
Combining Dorset Egg medium with the cheese cottage would give you a Dorset Cheese Omelette House and who could say fairer than that?
DKW- More information is needed on Josiah Jedediah Hatrack Whore Ass Man Cantrall and it is entered under "Common Household Pests". Also more on his Mom IYKWIMAITTYD

M. Bouffant said...

Some countries of the world are surly holdouts and not connected to others. I blame their parents.

Don't think we don't know who those countries are.

Rachel said...

I can help out in the department of silly songs, starting with:

http://youtu.be/WkGkv7NWyl4

Note: they'll spy for a song!

fish said...

This probably needs to be preserved somewhere.

fish said...

And maybe this.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

And certainly this.

Smut Clyde said...

The music industry is made up of a bunch of moistists!

Music corporations don't like pirates. Pirates travel around on water. Connect the dots!

Another Kiwi said...

This is serious fecking Research and Such Institute. We don't have cutesy animals and singing dogs!
Also not Eric Idle!
What the hell, people!!!

Von said...

C'mon - Z - really?
love ya
All of ya.
that's a lie.
MOST of you.

fish said...

Well played zombie. Well played.

fish said...

Lizard on an roomba?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

fish, all I could think of was how relieved everyone would be when it wasn't a link to one of SubMc's goatse efforts.

Smut Clyde said...

dammit, all I can find in my hard drive is Cheese Cottage.

And red wine.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

That's thunder's bailiwick, Mr. Clyde.

My compooters run on rum.

The desktop always wants tequila.

And the piano has been drinking.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

"an" roomba, fish?

fish said...

iPhone typoe.