When you're a dairy farmer, everything looks like a river of poop.

The highly informed readers of "Riddled" are, of course, aware of the seasonal distress that is afflicting New Zild at the moment. Other cultures with experience of these climatic extremes might call this "summer".
New Zilinders, however, take a more nuanced view of the higher temperatures and longer sunshine hours:
City and some rural people explain slowly and carefully that this is due to climate change because, look, the climate has changed. We used to have summer from December to February and while it got hot and we had droughts sometimes it wasn't every fecking year like it is now from January to April.
Farming people say "Lawks a mercy, we have run out of water. We need more water, more cows and less blimmin' government regulations holding down the backbone of the economy which is us by the way. Also this is not a handout we are asking for just unfettered access to water"
Power companies say "Lawks a mercy, we are running out of water, we need more water and less regulation and no taxes because look we are the backbone of the economy. Also get a job losers".
The government says "Lawks a mercy, we are running out of water and need to reduce house prices in Auckland. To do this, we must change a few minor parts of the Resource Management Act and give ALL THE WATER to farmers and power companies. Also, it sucks to be you, in our opinion."
Thus, by careful consideration of the issues which surround the backbone of the New Zild economy and by listening carefully to all stakeholders in the issue on an ongoing basis in a going forward momentum situation NZ decides to give ALL THE WATER to business people.
 Who could have foreseen this outcome?
 Brave new Zild Prime Minister John Key meanwhile, bravely goes to see The UK Prime Minister , at Chequers, where he bravely tells David Cameron that "Where Britain goes, so we goes to the- that place - we'll go too, not me though" And the NZ media soberly reports it as "Kiwis join anti-Islamic coalition" bless them. They have since retracted that and renamed it the "Anti-Islamic Crusade". Because the rugby team Canterbury Crusaders have...LOOK A SQUIRREL!!