Friday, October 14, 2011

Catechism

This is wrong.

Be more specific.

It is wrong in a way that can be divided into tiers.

How numerous are these tiers?

It is wrong on many levels.

Provide a helpful comparison.

It is wrong on more levels than a Chinese pagoda with duelling Bavarian Oom-pa-pa bands on every floor.

There is no possible justification for selling a gut-lubricating Kiwifruit concentrate and calling it "Phloe". Bad limericks about your friend Chloe do not count.

"Tell us your story and win!" the manufacturers rather rashly suggest.

14 comments:

Substance McGravitas said...

Holy crap!

M. Bouffant said...

Regularity is the least of my problems, indeed, I'm hoping SMcG will spare me some of his codeine-laced Tylenol to tighten me up.

Smut Clyde said...

Let's see. Take expensive bowel-irritating kiwifruit-extract tablets, or live on a diet of coffee and wheat beer and black-pudding-&-chilli pizza? Decisions, decisions.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

POOP!
~

fish said...

It causes rashes too?!?!

J— said...

Bad limericks about your friend Chloe do not count.

Now here's a little story about Zoë and Joey
Went to the store and bought a little Phloe
Took it back home and poured it in a bowly
Now they don't need to buy more colon blowy

tigris said...

Kiwis are birds, men and fruit
but only one opens the chute
it will open the phloe
of those in the know
though which and how much to dilute?

Unknown said...

LOL...you so crack me up Clyde. ;-)

mikey said...

At my age I won't renounce it
But as long as they've come to announce it
It's true those in my group
Can need help with our poop
I'd get Phloe if I could only pronounce it

Jennifer said...

Sounds more like a menstrual aid...

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

It is wrong on more levels than a Chinese pagoda with duelling Bavarian Oom-pa-pa bands on every floor

Smut is banned!

tigris, on the other hand, wins teh t00bz.

Smut Clyde said...

Related.

Smut is banned!
TO be fair to the Bavarians, that pagoda normally contains only one Oom-pa-pa banned at a time.

Dr.KennethNoisewater said...

I would be really--erm--relieved if these colon-obsessed people would just come right and say what their products do.

Consider these awesome catchphrases:

Phloe: It Makes You Poo
Phloe: Poop Happens


These ads write themselves...iffin' you're willing to be honest.

ckc (not kc) said...

Phloe: Are you so bunged up your back teeth are brown?