Just a reminder, folks, that it will be Hairy Salted Pineapple Night soon, so be sure to stock up from Riddled Purveyors of Magick Charmes And Such, your one stop shop for amulets to ward off evil. Here is noble Smut Clyde walking the streets in the spirit of Publick Servyce to ensure that people are not caught out and thus get a visit from Knackwurzle Man and His Fules in Love. See, he even carries a bucket of warm spit with which to bet people with. Emblematic of the level of professionalism here at Riddled Industries.
19 comments:
Alert readers will notice from the smoothness of the right side of my face that I have learned the hard way not to bring the Ouch Burnie Stick too close to the moustache.
How do he keep the spit warm?
Inquiring minds want to know...
Spit is kept warm with spitwarmer, Mikey.
How much for the Ouch Burnie Stick?
~
Vacuum flask, mikey.
After a focus group to discuss alternative fluid-based names, they were titled "Dewer Flasks" rather than "Spewer".
The record will show that I favoured "Sputum Flasks" and still do. It is a memorable yet practical name.
Seems weird to me there are evil eye amulets to protect one...but no hairy salted pineapple amulets. I smell a niche market!
The Ouch Burnie Stick is the least of your problems, Smut. Have you thought of seeing a chiropractor?
I think the Banner Ad for the Latin version of "The Longest Yard" running underneath the woodcut is just plain sellout...
Emblematic of the level of professionalism here at Riddled Industries.
Pfft. I come here for sentences and you skimp on the verbs.
How about a noun, S_McG?
~
I have a sack of hairy salted plums myself, but that's a tale for another day.
For Mr. McGravitas. The Verbs of God
Where's SMITE?
I have a sack of hairy salted plums myself
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
You clearly overestimate my intentions...
Can God make a verb he cannot conjugate himself?
Can God [....] a Mad-Lib he cannot [....] himself?
Do not go astray on Hairy Salted Pineapple Night
Though a hairy salted pineapple might
Hairy salted pineapples are willing to take that chance
And risk being snared by Smut Clyde or Another Kiwi
Is that a hairy salted pineapple in your pants?
Or are you just happy to see me.
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