Through a fault of our designing We are lost among the windings Of these metal ways

We were expecting a night of relaxation from our responsibilities, for it was Convergent-Evolution-of-Malpighian-Tubules Trivia and Welding-Plastic-Tea-spoons-into-Sculptures-with-a-Cigarette-Lighter Evening at the Old Entomologist. But there is no respite for we horny-handed tons of soil who labour in the gardens of Academe... for tigris was wanting to know, is there any progress with the planarian-based cloning technique that we were heralding two years ago just the other day with drum and fife?

As you can see, the process is out of the laboratory now and into production. The Beta testers are encountering a peculiar side-effect... something to do with the flatworms concentrating metal ions from the environment. Another Kiwi is inclined to blame this on the Mollycule Theory, and on bringing the flatworms into repeated violent contact with jokes that are an iron. If the problem persists we will simply re-brand the process as a tool for Superfund bio-remediation.


Also certain poor losers individuals should have known better than try to weld plastic tea-spoons with iPhones, which may be the same size as a cigarette lighter but are NO SUBSTITUTE.