Bottles of blackness, the blacker the spare

When you visit Riddled Alternative Health Clinic and Noxious Weed Extirpation Specialists, our trained clinicians will select the personalised, color-coded medication specific to your condition.

Do not be alarmed if consumption of Christmas Ale Personalised Medication causes beach towels and blank speech bubbles to fall out of an empty sky. This is a common side-effect and perfectly benign.

Doctors S. Clyde and A. Kiwi have the best qualifications money can buy, and many years of experience in staring at bottles of murky totally-non-cactus-based fluids.

While you await your turn in our busy but well-appointed waiting rooms,our intern and part-time beggar-of-the-month Little Tim will ensure that your pet snakes are fed and entertained.

Observe the contrast with MacGravitas Laboratories, where the dispensing staff and bottle-starers feel obliged to conceal their identities behind a Scramble Suit. Does this instil confidence in their training and trustworthiness? DOES IT BOGROLL.